I May Not Be A Smart Man

I may not be a smart man. In fact, I'm not a man at all. But I know what "old" is. At least, I do as of this morning.

So there I was, sitting in my car at a red light, looking for and removing white hairs from my 'do, when I looked in the rear view mirror and noticed my son watching me. His eyes caught mine, and he decided to enlighten me with a little advice.

Check out those white invaders in my rich brunette locks! Out! Out, I say!

Bear:  "Mom, you may have some white hairs, but you're not old."
Me:  "No?"
Bear:  "No. Forty-two is still young. You are young and beautiful."
Me:  "Why thank you, angel."
Bear:  "Think of it like rounding. Forty-nine and under, you're young. Fifty and up, you're old."
Me:  "Are you saying that when I turn fifty, I'll be old?"
Bear:  "Yep."
Me:  "Cool. Then I have a while yet to enjoy my youth."

There you have it, folks. If you're forty-nine or younger, you're young. Otherwise, just give up and accept your elderly status.

So says Bear.